Our girls can sing!

I have always known that music and dance are critical parts of how our family experiences joy.  We love listening to music, Samir's loves making music, and all of us love dancing.  However, until this weekend, I never realized how much the girls and I love making music as well.  Both girls are currently taking piano lessons and Amara especially has taken to it.  She is learning very fast and chooses to practice on her own and actually plan what she is supposed to.  Annika takes a more open minded approach to piano lessons and practices mostly whatever she makes up at the keys.   Both girls sing a great deal on their own and with others.  Amara loves to sing fun songs and requests them to played when we are driving.  Annika tends to make up her own songs and words or sing along with songs from Spanish class or music class.  

Annika told me this weekend as we were preparing for our first family public singing (at a retirement home with our friends Jen/Brad/Daughters) that she sang a solo at school during their student only Holiday show.  Amara has always shown steady interest and capability to sing on her own as well as in front of others but I was shocked that Annika had the talent and determination as well. I had no idea she was so brave or so on key.  The more I started to pay attention to her singing the more I realized she was good.  Really good.  She even wanted to solo at the retirement home.  She ended up getting too shy but sang along well with just me on a pretty tough song.  

The weirdest part is how it is affecting me.  I have avoided singing in front of other for most of my life.  I actually would pretend to sing during chorus class and school music events when truly nothing came out of my mouth.  I have never karaoke-d and would prefer not to.   All this fear of singing got worse when I dated/married a guy who loves to sing for himself and others.  When I see his confidence and freedom, it makes me more shy and exemplifies that I am not a singer by any accord. My voice has been on lock down for past 20 years besides when I sing to the girls every night.   However, it is only me and them in the room.  I don't sing loud, and mostly do lullabies.  Preparing the girls for the Christmas Caroling was tons of fun and it forced me to get out of vocal lock down.  I couldn't practice with them without actually singing.  And I realized that I wasn't terrible.  And my daughters like my voice and want me to sing with them.   Not sure that I am any good at all but I haven't killed any birds or kids or elderly with my attempts.   

I guess my point in this post was to document for myself and daughters once again how powerful of a teacher motherhood is.  It really has forced me to become the best version of myself.   Annika asked me about why grown ups don't get gifts from Santa and if I was sad about it.  I told her the gifts from Santa get better as you get older but they don't typically come in a box.  This year, my Christmas gift was being inspired/forced to sing out loud after years of denying myself this pleasure.